My Son, the Hoover
Sometimes I think that Henry messes with us on purpose. “But he’s only 3 1/2 months old,” you say! “What could he possibly do?” Well, let me explain.
Yesterday, Henry was a wreck. Crying all the time. Sniffling. Runny eyes. Fighting naps. General crabbiness we haven’t seen since… well, since Saturday morning. But it was obvious to anyone who looked at him or held him or felt his vengeful stare that he was sick. (As opposed to Saturday when he was just overly gassy and unhappy to be too close to his shiny-haired first cousin, once removed.)
So, Kristen calls the doctor and sets up an appointment for this morning, fearing that we’d have an ill baby on our hands (which, I’ve heard, can be a glorious week-long nerve shredding experience). But of course, how is Henry feeling today? Fine. Wonderful. Better than wonderful.
He hammed it up with the nurses. He cracked up the doctor. He made the custodial staff drop their mops and start laughing hysterically. (That last one’s a bit of an exaggeration.) And after being examined for everything from strep to an ear infection, he was found to be perfectly healthy.
The doctor did alert us to one thing, however. It’s that Henry’s eating too much. When I or the nanny take care of Henry, he’s been drinking about 20 oz of breastmilk during the day, although sometimes it’s significantly more. (I assume in the morning and after work, he’ll chug another 8 oz, although we can’t be sure because, unlike the bottles we use to feed him, Kristen doesn’t have nice dashes on her body that note how much he’s devoured.)
Kristen is worried that this is just too much, that he shouldn’t need to eat this much. I say, “The boy wants to eat, let him eat.” The fact that he’s not chubby in the least (except for those amazing cheeks) and is growing like a weed tells me that he needs this food. There have been many a heated discussion between the two of us over how much food should eat.
Well, at the doctor today, Kristen asked if 20 oz from a bottle — combined with what he gets directly from her — is too much for Henry. The doctor said, “Well, I think it’s okay. What is he 9 months old?” Nine months old!? He’s not even 4!
His doctor, a man with 35 years of pediatric doctoring, thinks he’s 9 months old. This is a scary proposition. In fact, I was talking to a friend at work whose daughter just turned one, and Henry is as long as she and weighs only 1 pound less!
So we were informed that, yes, he is eating just a little too much, and the pediatrician suggested different ways to make Henry feel more satisfied after his meals (feed him sitting up, feed him more often but with smaller amounts, diet pills). I’m hoping this works, but who knows.
He could just be messing with us yet again.
